Lisa Francesca
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Thoughts about weddings, writing, and the world

You CAN Write Your Own Wedding Vows

7/3/2018

 
​Some couples just want to say “I do.” Others are happy to simply repeat the traditional, “For richer or poorer, in sickness and in health.” And still others want to write their own vows.

There is no wrong way or right decision; only what is most comfortable for you. If speaking aloud during your wedding is an unwanted load of pressure on an already full day, don’t do it.

On the other hand, if you are comfortable reading a vow you’ve written beforehand, here is a sweet template to get you started. Once you’re started, feel free to throw out the template.

Lisa’s throwaway template:

(Name), I love you because. . . .
I love your . . .
I love that you  . . .
And how you make me . . .
I promise that . . . .
And I promise to . . . .

A few more thoughts:

At a minimum, try to write five or seven lines.. At maximum, anything longer than a page is a little rough on your guests.

If you are a funny person, it’s OK to add a touch of humor. If you have gone through very difficult circumstances with your beloved, you can mention this, but overall, try to keep everything in the vows positive and upbeat.

Some couples feel better if they know what each other will say, so they write or review their vows together. Others prefer to keep them secret from each other until the ceremony. If you choose the latter, try to let each other know how long your vow will be for a better balance.

It’s best to jot them down. Trying to memorize them adds another element of risk, which might keep you from being fully present during your wedding ceremony.

Finally, don't be afraid to try writing your vows. If they come from your heart, there is no wrong way to write them!
Jocelyn Stephen
7/11/2018 08:23:17 am

Just last week, my son and his fiancé were talking about writing their vows. They didn't know where to start. Your template will be incredibly helpful! Thank you.

Lisa Francesca
7/17/2018 02:40:19 pm

Thank you, Jocelyn, I'm glad this blog could be of service!

cindy leonard
7/23/2018 05:47:10 pm

There is not a specific category for my question. My daughter and her fiance asked me to officiate, the Mother of the Bride. I am honored and looking forward to the experience. The Wedding Officiant's Guide has been a wonderful resource for all the details - except for my uncommon situation. I tried to reach you by email, but alas, it was returned. Thank you very much. All best, Cindy

Lisa Francesca
7/24/2018 12:33:47 pm

Hi Cindy, this is a great topic! I will address it in my next post. Also, thank you for letting me know the email didn't work; I will try to fix.
Lisa


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